My baby boy in heaven

To know how and why I was not able to get any pictures of my dear baby boy I need to first say how he was conceived. As you read in the about me blog the woman who raised me had strangers SA me and when I was 14 I became pregnant by one of those men. To hide the fact that I was 0ne pregnant and two the fact of what she was doing. She had the father of my baby hide me in his basement the entire pregnancy. The only form of health care was some people she paid to keep quite about it. On September 15, 1994 I went into labor and I had him. She took him away immediately. I never got to hold him, never got to count his toes or fingers, never heard him cry, nothing....... The next morning I was taken back to her house and was told to never speak of him and go on as though it never happened. I spent the entire day crying. The next morning I asked her about my son and she told me he was in a home with a family being taken care of and that I will never see him again. After a few weeks went by I asked her again about my son and that I decided to give him a name even if he was not with me. I told her I named him Dean Scott La Combe. This time she told she had gotten rid of him in such a way that no one will ever find him, see him, or even hear him. I must have had a look of horror on my face because she started laughing and told me to get the hell over it. That night I laid in bed thinking what she could have done when the campsite that a man had taken me to pop into my head. The next morning I left for school, but went to the campsite instead. I walked around the grounds looking for anything that could mean she did something to Dean there. I checked each firepit and when I saw some fabric in one, I got an immediate pit in my stomach and fell to the ground. I reached for the fabric and underneath it was a tiny bone. I was not sure it was Dean's bone. After I calmed down a little I looked at the fabric and saw my initals on it and I knew then it was Dean. I walked back home numb to everything.